Guy at grocery, in produce section: “So, what are you planning on doing with that cucumber?” (This was said in a manner that my mother would consider improper. There was a wink and a raised eyebrow and a touch to the arm.)
I mean, how am I supposed to respond to that? I realize that vegetable could be construed as suggestive, but PLEASE. You could go the risqué route, the innocent route, or, as is my style when asked a stupid question, the obvious route.
Me: Chop it within an inch of its life and put it in the salad I’m having for dinner.
Guy: What time should I come over? (Standing a bit too close)
Me: Oh, you really don’t think you’ll score a dinner invitation with that line, do you? (Me, inching away)
Guy: Never hurts to try.
Me: Really? I think your dignity is bleeding.
Guy: Man, you’re tough.
Actually, I was just hungry. But you know, don’t interrupt a woman deep into dinner planning. It never ends well. And sweet, freaking Moses, don’t try to hit on someone over penis shaped veggies. That’s just bad form.
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment