Take me on, baby...

As a child of the 80’s, I have a complete and utter love for the happy pop music that accompanied my generation through grade/middle/high school. More specifically, I would like to speak of the awesomeness that is “Take On Me” by a-ha. The song remains firmly lodged in my own personal Top 10…I know, I know, I shouldn’t admit that. But if a song can get me moving each time I hear it, then those of you who are sitting there in judgment thinking “REALLY? Take On Me?” can just suck it. Have you SEEN that video? Genius.

So the other day at work, a-ha came on my iPod (and wouldn’t you know it? everyone in the studio just perked right up!). John yelled out from the front “Take On Me? I LOVE this song!” to which I replied “I KNOW! How hot was Morten Harket in this video?”

…which we of course immediately had to look up on YouTube. I highly suggest watching it since everyone needs a treat on a Monday - you'll thank me later. It’s as riveting now as it was then…plus MALL BANGS!



John, still unconvinced of Morten’s hotness, needed more evidence, and so a Google search ensued, which brought up sufficient photographic proof. However, I went too deep, and came across this little tidbit which has been causing me some distress:




It’s as though the photographer caught Morten in a moment when he was turning to Wardrobe and asking “Are you SURE these jeans don’t make my butt look big?” And they do, Morten, they do. Also flat. And how long is the rise on those suckers, because I’m pretty sure they’re almost up under your armpits and it’s taking away from your sexy. Seeing a childhood crush take on such a female stance – and one that we do only if trying to interest the opposite sex or to check for visible panty lines – has really thrown me for a loop. Nothing that a mojito won’t solve, I’m sure…I should send my bar tab to Google who by making it so easy to find information has also tarnished the perfect image I had in my head. See, if we were back in the 80’s I wouldn’t have had such access and could just watch the music video over and over again on my VCR…

Things that have annoyed me today...

1) The driver I couldn't get out from behind on my commute in to work. Not only was he inconsistent in his speed but refused to use his blinker. People who do that should have a bucket taped to their head and be sent out to play in traffic.

2) The woman in front of me at Peets today who had on nylons with open toed shoes. Girl, NO.

3) The cashier at Peets who handed me my scone with his bare hands since they were out of bags...I don't like revealing that I have this phobia of people touching my food, so I was then in the predicament of having to tell him that I needed a new one and could he please use the tongs that were RIGHT THERE and FOR THAT PURPOSE?

4) The profuse amount of Nickleback that has been playing lately. Why must you (radio gods) torture my ears with that? And on a Friday? Before my latte?

5) That The View was playing in the background at work. If I wanted to listen to a bunch of chickens being strangled (which is what that show is akin to for me), I would. That show should only be inflicted on people if they've been heavily sedated first...and tequila shots would probably be frowned upon at work...before lunch.

6) That my client who came in with a broken foot and sprained wrist then complained that I hadn't worked her out hard enough. She almost added a bruised shin to her list of ailments with that comment.

7) That my underwear keeps riding up. I think my ass has gotten too big.

8) That I forgot my sunglasses at Cory's and it's SUPER bright out.

9) That EVERY TIME I go to the bathroom at work the toilet paper roll is empty...and the new rolls are DIRECTLY in front of the toilet in this charming little basket, so it's not like it would cause someone to pop a rib out to put the new roll on. I swear, I exist only to do this menial task.

10) That someone ate the soy yogurt I had put in the fridge at work. Seriously, that stuff tastes like ass and only I like it, so wtf?

I'm actually in a brilliantly happy mood today - shock, I know! Sometimes, one just needs to air out the list of grievances...much better...

Yes, they're fake...

I've had an unprecedented day today...I've had four different people in completely unrelated incidents ask me if my hair is in fact, natural. Being a white blond, I get this question on the average of twice a week, and after 32 years of such an inquiry, have run out of clever responses.

The last instance, was however, different from most. I was teaching pilates to a male client and I noticed him starting at my face at regular intervals. It wasn't a "you're a stunning beauty!" look, but more consistent with "she has spinach in her teeth and I'm not sure how to tell her."

Feeling both annoyed and bold (I got a REALLY good nights sleep) I said,

"Dude, what's up with the staring?"

"Um....well, I don't know how to say this, but is your hair real?"

Sigh..."As far as I know, yes. 20 more bicep curls, please."

He was not to be daunted now that I had opened the door..."Well, if your hair is really that blond, then are your eyebrows and eyelashes the fake part?"

No one had ever been this pointed, so I have to give him credit..."Yes, I have to draw in my eyebrows and eyelashes every morning. Pain in the ass, but otherwise, I'd look like Powder, except without the boy parts or baldness."

"Who?"

Observe:



And thanks to Katie who gave me that nickname junior year of college - amazing what floats into memory at 2pm in the afternoon when the integrity of ones eyebrows is being questioned.